Pom In Oz with Derek Goforth: If line between helping and handling is crossed, it can become quiet prejudice

Racism isn’t always the loud and hateful thing people think it is. Sometimes it wears a smile and speaks in the language of care. It hides behind programs, policies and promises, claiming to help while quietly holding people back. That is the kind of racism I have seen far too often, the kind that calls itself progress. I have worked alongside many Indigenous Australians over the years. I have seen passion, drive, and pride in culture that is both humbling and inspiring. I have met people who want to forge their own paths, to build better futures for their families and communities without being told how to do it. These are people with incredible resilience, wisdom, and creativity. But I have also seen the other side of the story. I have seen injustices that leave people in need ignored, passed over, or pushed aside by the very systems that claim to protect them. Too often, decisions are made for Indigenous people instead of with them. It might come wrapped in good intentions, but it feels like control. I have watched as policies and programs become more about ticking boxes and winning headlines than truly empowering communities. I have seen the frustration that follows when good people are spoken to like children, when their knowledge is dismissed, and when virtue signalling takes the place of real action. There is a fine line between helping and handling, and once it is crossed, genuine care turns into quiet prejudice. Paternalism pretends to lift people up but really just keeps them in their place. It assumes Indigenous Australians cannot thrive without constant intervention, when in truth they simply need to be heard and trusted. This kind of patronising approach also creates division. When one group is seen to receive constant special treatment, even if it is well-meant, resentment begins to grow. That resentment feeds misunderstanding, and misunderstanding turns into hostility. What began as an attempt to unite ends up driving people further apart. I have seen that division play out in classrooms, workplaces, and communities. It is real, and it is painful. If we truly want unity, then we must stop speaking about people and start listening to them. True progress will come from partnership, not pity. It means Indigenous leadership in decision-making, not just a token voice at the table. I have seen what works, and it is simple respect. Let communities define their own success. Let people lead their own journeys. Because when we confuse control with compassion, we do not solve racism, we reinvent it. And until we learn to tell the difference, the divide will only grow, no matter how good our intentions sound. Derek Goforth is an expat and father of three living and working in Geraldton